Motivation

The trap of ageism

/ Motivation, Personal

“It is too late now… I have missed the bus.”

“You are too old to do that…”

“Behave according to your age. What will people say?”

Have you ever heard such statements before?

If so, you have in all likelihood encountered “ageism” and ageist behaviour. Unknowingly, we all participate in it, and it has an impact on us all. According to WHO, “Ageism refers to the stereotypes (how we think), prejudice (how we feel) and discrimination (how we act) towards others or oneself based on age.” We all have certain self-limiting notions about what is appropriate and capable at different ages. The fear of growing old has a detrimental impact on our motivation and mental health. We start accepting that it is too late to do anything that could make us happy. But is it really true?

Recently I came across a wonderful article by Shashi Tharoor (a well-known politician, writer and public intellectual who has served as a Member of Parliament for Thiruvananthapuram, Kerala) on this topic. It is titled, ‘Why we should increase our retirement age?’ I am reposting it here for you to read before my reflection on the piece:

This month, my mother turns 83 (or 84, depending on whether you go by her memory or the possibly inaccurate date on her passport). She is amazingly fit and mentally agile, and at year’s end she is travelling with us to the other end of the world for a New Year’s reunion of her entire family of descendants— three children, seven grandchildren, three great-grandchildren and assorted spouses. It is intended to be a celebration of our togetherness, despite the quirks of geography—among this brood, there are now three nationalities and nine different addresses around the world. But it is also a celebration of her active longevity, because somewhere between 83 and 84, she hits the fabled sathabhishekam, when she will have seen a thousand moons orbiting the planet.

(I know many Hindus celebrate the sathabhishekam in their 81st year, but they are mathematically challenged. Since you basically witness 12 moon orbits a year, 80 clocks up only 960 moon orbits, and you need the extra three years and four months to reach 1,000. Letters of protest may kindly be addressed to the editor and not to me.)

I was reflecting on this when I came across a study from the New England Journal of Medicine (2018) that found that the most productive age in a human’s life is not your 20s or 30s, but 60 to 70. And, the study confirms that the second most productive age is between 70 and 80 and the third most productive decade is 50 to 60.

What is going on here? Is this another disinformation campaign by the oldies among us, trying to vindicate their creaking joints, swollen knees, aching backs and greying hair by purveying fake news about their superiority to the fit, energetic, six-pack-sporting, young whippersnappers who are actually producing everything that matters in the world?

Not quite. Consider the evidence: The average age of a Nobel Prize winner is 62. The average age of a CEO in a Fortune 500 company is 63. The average age of popes is 76. And, in India, the average age of the cabinet is 60. Our prime minister, at 69, is a mere juvenile compared with some of his predecessors, such as Morarji Desai, who became PM at 81, or even the much-maligned Jawaharlal Nehru, who died in office at 74.

Looking back at my own life, next month I will publish my 20th book. Ten of those have seen the light of print since after my 50th birthday. There is little doubt that I have been more productive in my sixth and now seventh decade than in my (at least partially) misspent youth.

There is a logical reason for this. It is true that when you are young you are still feeling your way, acquiring the skills you need and laying the foundations of your future achievements. Most of our 20s and 30s are spent on romance, on wooing our future partner, and in creating and bringing up our family. The responsibility of making a living, of educating our children, and of taking care of our parents is a time-consuming one that inevitably distracts us from a single-minded focus on professional accomplishment.

In other words, most people’s social and personal circumstances mean that their lives are so designed that the best years of their existence are between 60 and 80. That is the age when they have acquired whatever skills they are likely to acquire, have made (and learned from) their mistakes, and can focus on sharpening and deploying those skills. Thanks to modern medicine, most people are able to remain reasonably healthy past 60 and, even if physically slower, remain capable of top-quality intellectual performance. It is an age when there are fewer distractions. It is the time when you can do your best work.

This is why it is a crying shame that the arbitrary tyranny of retirement age deprives so many offices of performers at their peak. While most western countries have increased their retirement ages to 65 and 70 (and the US has outlawed compulsory retirement altogether), we are still letting people go when they could be making a major difference. In Kerala, government employees still retire at 56. (Politicians, of course, never retire. They just fade away.)

So, if you are turning 60, don’t give up: remember the best years of your life lie ahead!

~ Shashi Tharoor, theweek.in

The article reaffirmed my belief that “It is never too late.”

I’ve given this advice repeatedly: Don’t postpone anything because of age.

Shashi Tharoor quoted various examples of achievers post the retirement age. There are many senior entrepreneurs too! The most popular one is Colonel Sanders of KFC fame who decided to begin to franchise his chicken concept and travelled the US looking for suitable restaurants at the age of 69!

Nykaa founder Falguni Nayyar started her entrepreneurial journey at 50 and became India’s first female self-made billionaire while the supermarket chain Dmart was founded by 45-year-old Radhakrishnan Damani at a point when he had already made his millions in the stock market.

A Harvard Business Review also debunks the bias that startups are only for young entrepreneurs. It reports that the “average age of a successful startup founder is 45”, showing that the older you get, the higher the success rate!

I am a living example of how age is just a number.

I launched my own business at the age of 42! I first learned how to use a computer at the age of 57. At 62, I began teaching business courses at various institutes. At 73, because of the pandemic, I had to learn how to conduct online classes, and now I am comfortably attending even guest lectures online. Can you imagine someone who began to write emails around 60, now working independently on a computer and maintaining a blog? For me, as Tharoor said, the best years of my life are still ahead! In fact, I started writing at the age of 72, and published my first book at 73 this year!

The trap of ageism can make you devalue yourself. If you are limiting yourself on the basis of how old you are:

Break Free!

The trap of ageism Read More »

Don’t assume you are going to fail…

/ Motivation
Image: “Learned Helplessness: A Terrible Psychological Prison”, Psychology Spot

Most of us have experienced this situation at least some time in our life when we have resigned from a situation assuming that we will not succeed at it. We imagine the rejection or the embarrassment that comes from failure, and opt-out. Maybe this fear of failure is a learned behaviour. Psychologists have studied the impact of this in animals, children and adults too! 

This is also part of “conditioning”, a process in which we train animals with rewards and punishments. 

During one such research experiment, a marine biologist placed a shark into a large holding tank and then released several small bait fish into the tank. As you would expect, the shark quickly swam around the tank, attacked, and ate the smaller fish.

In the second part, the marine biologist inserted a strong piece of clear fibreglass into the tank, creating a partition. She then put the shark on one side of the fibreglass and a new set of bait fish on the other. Again, the shark quickly attacked. 

However, this time the shark slammed into the fibreglass divider and bounced off. Undeterred, the shark kept repeating this behaviour every few minutes to no avail. Meanwhile, the bait fish swam around unharmed in the second partition. Eventually, about an hour into the experiment, the shark gave up.

This experiment was repeated several dozen times over the next few weeks. Each time, the shark got less aggressive and made fewer attempts to attack the bait fish, until eventually, the shark got tired of hitting the fibreglass divider and simply stopped attacking altogether.

The marine biologist then removed the fibreglass divider, but the shark didn’t attack. The shark finally had been trained to believe a barrier existed between it and the bait fish and didn’t attempt to do anything. It had presumed its failure and stayed in its line.

This is how we train strong elephants tied with a measly rope on a pole to stay put in their place. This is true even for humans too!

When we feel that we had no control over the past events of their lives, we continue to believe in our own helplessness. We think that nothing they do will ever change the outcome of an event. Even when the situation has objectively changed, we have learned the behaviour of fear or helpless resignation. We often left thinking that they should not even bother trying.

Someone rightly said, “Whether You Think You Can, or Think You Can’t … You’re Right.”

Don’t assume you are going to fail… Read More »

The Stone Soup

/ Motivation
Image Credit: Andrawaag, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons

Today, the story that I am going to share is a popular European folk story. Let me introduce the story with you, and reflect later!

“The Stone Soup”

Once, a traveller reaches a town beset by poverty.

When they see the traveller walking past, the inhabitants try to discourage the traveller from staying. Understandably, they fear that he would stop by their door and ask them to give him some food after his long journey. They tell him, in no uncertain terms, “There’s no food anywhere to be found. The village is home to poor people.” They shut their windows and doors on him.

The traveller tries to explain that he does not need any food. He says, “I don’t want any! Thank you! Although, I was trying to make my famous recipe of ‘stone soup’… and I wanted to share it with all of you.”

The villagers watch him suspiciously as he builds a fire and fills a cauldron with water. They maintain a distance, lurking around the fire or watching from their windows as he sets his cauldron. With great ceremony, the traveller pulls a stone from a bag and drops it into the pot of water.

He sniffs the brew extravagantly and exclaims how delicious the stone soup is. As the villagers draw closer, beginning to show interest, he exclaims, “Ah! What a sumptuous soup! But a little cabbage would have brought out the flavour even more!”

Hearing him, a villager brings out a cabbage to share. Delighted, the traveller exclaims, “You, sir, deserve an extra serving of the delicious soup later!”

Another villager walks by, inquiring about the pot, and the traveler again mentions how the stone soup has not yet reached its full potential. More and more villagers walk by. Each add another ingredient to the pot like potatoes, tomatoes, celery, salt, pepper and much more. In this way, all of them unwittingly contribute to preparing an actual soup.

Finally, the stone, which is inedible, is removed from the pot. The villagers enjoy the delicious and nourishing pot of soup, sharing it among each other! By the end of the feast, the traveller drinks the leftover soup and continues his journey.

From the day on, the village learns to pool its resources, and face adversity together, becoming a much happier place!

This story addresses the human tendency to hoard in times of deprivation. When resources are scarce, we pull back and put all of our energy into self-preservation. We isolate ourselves and shut out others. Think about how people acted at the beginning of the lockdown. Hoarding essential goods to themselves, thus emptying the shelves where there is none left for others.

As the story of stone soup reveals, in doing so, we often deprive ourselves and everyone else of a feast. Of course, this metaphor plays out beyond the realm of food and material things.

We hoard ideas, love, and energy, thinking we will be richer if we keep them to ourselves. In truth, we make the world and ourselves poorer whenever we greedily stockpile our reserves.
The traveller could see that the villagers were holding back, and he had the genius to draw them out and inspire them to give, thus creating a delicious meal that none of them could have prepared alone.

Now, you must reflect on whether you have a similar tendency to withdraw in the face of adversity. Are you like one of the villagers, holding back? If you come forward and share your skills and knowledge, your time and efforts, and your belongings, you will inspire others to do the same.

The reward is a banquet that can nourish many!

The Stone Soup Read More »

Respect the ‘No’

/ Motivation
Read on for the story of “The Bird and The Tree”.

In our culture, we have learned to take offence to someone saying “No” to us. It goes both ways too: We ourselves may feel guilty when we must refuse someone, even though we may do it politely. I have been on both sides of the situation in my life. There have been times when I have regretted not being able to say “No” when I had too much on my plate already. Many other times, I have been disappointed by someone’s decision to opt-out of an engagement. It is difficult to unlearn, but it remains an important life lesson.

I was interested to write about this topic because my friend and reader of the blog, Sudarshan Srinivasan, sent me an interesting story recently. Regular readers may be familiar with him, as he often sends me such thought-provoking short anecdotes. I find these little stories useful to discuss in the classroom, and I hope you find value in them too!

The following is a commonly-shared story.

“The Bird and The Tree.”

Once upon a time, there was a little bird searching for a home. It was going to be monsoon soon, and she had to build a nest to protect herself from the rains. It had to be a safe place to lay her eggs too. The bird searched far and wide. Finally, the search led it to a forest. It looked like the forest was full of trees which could be the perfect cover in the case of a heavy downpour.

The bird approached the first tree and asked for its protection. To its shock and dismay, the tree flatly refused to give it shelter.
Disheartened but determined, it flew to another tree next to it. Luckily for the little creature, the second tree agreed. So, it built its nest in the small hole in the trunk of the tree and laid its eggs.

Soon enough, the weather changed. This year, the rains were relentless. It was so heavy that the first tree fell and was carried away by the flood! Seeing it float by, the bird taunted it: “See, isn’t this Karma? You rejected me when I needed help, and now you have been punished for it?”

The tree with a brave face said, “I already knew that I was not going to survive this rainy season. My roots felt weak, and I couldn’t take the risk of hurting you and your children’s lives!” The bird was shocked to hear this and it wanted to take its harsh words back. The tree continued, “I had to refuse because I wanted to protect you.” Ashamed and hurt, the bird gave a meek apology and fell silent.

Moral of the story:
Always respect the NO. A good fortune may lie behind a refusal or rejection that one may be unaware of in the moment but may reveal itself in time.

I really enjoyed this short story.

The first thing to understand is that we should not always consider someone’s “NO” as their arrogance, since we don’t know the whole picture. The story clearly demonstrates this learning. There could be many reasons that someone must have chosen not to oblige, which sometimes even you cannot help. Sometimes, we get so self-involved in our problems that we forget to assess the other person’s point of view. If you can respect someone’s “No”, you also would not be subject to their petty lies to escape the situation. It is because you are not being judgemental and can accept their truth.

Respecting “No’s”, both your own and others, builds character. Even if the decision is not in your favour, you must accept it without rage. You never know what good lies ahead, and which new path this single “No” can lead you to.

Respect the ‘No’ Read More »

The Carpenter’s House

/ Motivation

I recently came across a story which, according to me, is a wonderful example of work ethics and professionalism. I think this is an anecdote that you may be familiar with, but I hope it enriches your day to read and recall it once again.

The Carpenter’s House

An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He had worked tirelessly to build many houses in his lifetime. Many appreciated the work he had done for years to come.

Although he would miss his weekly paycheck, he was sure that the time had come for him to retire. He informed his employer of his decision. “I plan to leave the construction business for good so that I can live the rest of my life more leisurely with my wife. I could use my time to unwind and enjoy with my extended family,” he explained to his boss.

The employer was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favour. The carpenter obliged.

However, as time went on, it became clear that his heart was not in his work. He used shoddy workmanship and low-quality materials. It was a sad way to conclude a long and devoted career.

His boss came to visit the house after the carpenter completed his job. Then he handed the carpenter the front-door key and stated, “This is your home now… This is my parting gift to you.”

The carpenter was shocked! He thought to himself, “What a shame!” He was full of remorse and regret. If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently.

So, it is with us!

We construct our life one day at a time, often putting in less than our best effort. Eventually, we learn, to our surprise, that we must live in this “house” we have erected. We wonder how we would do things differently if we could go back in time. Obviously, we can’t return or turn back time.

So remember, you’re the carpenter of your life. You hammer a nail, place a board, or build a wall every day. Every little job that you do says something about your work ethic. Every little step you take adds value to your life.

Someone once said, “Life is a do-it-yourself project.”
Your attitude and actions now build the “home” you’ll live in tomorrow.
Therefore, build it thoughtfully!

The Carpenter’s House Read More »

16 reasons why you should be an entrepreneur

/ Business, Motivation
Entrepreneurship is not only a financially rewarding prospect, but it is also an intellectually stimulating and uplifting journey!

Starting a new business and/or a commercial or social enterprise is thrilling and intimidating at the same time. The delight of boarding on a new expedition, mapping a new path, being self-sufficient and in control, the possibility of accumulating substantial personal wealth, solving peoples’ problems, meeting those unmet needs of the society, and making the world a better place to live are all reasons to look ahead with great excitement and hope.

For some people working in a 9 to 5 job feels monotonous and stifling, while some really thrive in the structured environment. But if you are the former, entrepreneurship is for you.  

Let me list down some compelling reasons why you should be an entrepreneur.

Reason 1.  You have full control over your destiny. 

You call the shots and make the decisions that ultimately determine the success or failure of your business. Nobody will get in the way of your vision.

Reason 2. You are your own boss

You get to decide what you want to do, how you want to do it, and who you want to do it with. There’s something amazing about being able to say you work for yourself. Did you not like the way things were done at your previous job? You could do it your way with your own company.

Reason 3. You make your own plans & schedules.

Are you an owl or a lark? I mean, do you prefer to work late into the evenings or bright and early at 5 am? When you’re your own boss you get to decide when you want to work.

Reason 4. You pick your clients and projects

You have complete control over the types of clients you want. Once you’ve created your own business, you’ll be able to turn down clients and projects that aren’t a good fit for you and focus on those that do.

Reason 5. You pick your own team

As captain of your own ship, you pick who to invite aboard! If you want a young crew or experienced professionals, you decide what works best for your project.

Reason 6. You become a provider.

 As an entrepreneur you will become a provider for many. Your employees will depend on your leadership and decision-making, as it will directly impact their livelihood and well-being. 

Reason 7. Opportunity to give back. 

Owning a business gives you the opportunity to support local charity events, local schools and non-profit organization. Being able to make a difference in your community is a great feeling.

Reason 8. Every day is different

Being an entrepreneur is anything but monotonous. There are always fresh business prospects to dive into, new ideas to brainstorm and execute, and new individuals to collaborate with. Being an entrepreneur is a never-ending rollercoaster, but if you enjoy what you do, it’s a thrilling journey with new challenges every day.

Reason 9. It enables you to dream big.

No idea is too crazy and no goal is too big when you are an entrepreneur — you can dream as big as you want

Reason 10. You learn new things

As an entrepreneur, you must wear multiple hats. This frequently entails picking up new skills and continuing to learn and improve on them. Part of what makes being an entrepreneur so fascinating is constantly adapting and shapeshifting by learning new things.

Reason 11. Entrepreneurs are innovators. 

Think of all the new technology and ideas that have come to life over the past few years. Those were all once just an idea — but amazing entrepreneurs brought those ideas to life.

Reason 12. You help shape the world

Great entrepreneurs are problem solvers who fill a gap in the market, whether it’s internationally or locally. Every small contribution to the economy makes a difference in the world we live in. You are meeting the need of consumers and will benefit from the goodwill you create.  You can directly impact society by introducing a service or product that people use. 

Reason 13. You have the opportunity to change lives.

Have an idea for a product or service that has the potential to make a huge impact? Go for it — nothing is stopping you!

Reason 14. You do what you love

Doing what you love is the best part of being an entrepreneur. When you’re working with people you enjoy and are doing things that inspire you, it is just easier to get up in the morning with a smile on your face. This is what makes starting a business worthwhile.

Reason 15. You serve as a role model. 

As an entrepreneur, people will look up to you. You have the ability to be a role model for family, friends, employees and community members. Your success serves as motivation and inspiration.

Reason 16. Create a legacy. 

Creating a successful brand to the point where it leaves a personal legacy behind is appealing and serves as motivation for many entrepreneurs. 

I hope these reasons have convinced you to dip your toes in the vast sea of possibilities that entrepreneurship is! For me, each one of them has been true, and I have thoroughly enjoyed every moment of the entrepreneurial journey.

References:

  • Holden, Kristie. “10 Reasons to Love Being an Entrepreneur” Marketcircle, 8 Feb. 2016, marketcircle.blog/10-reasons-to-love-being-an-entrepreneur.
  • Long, Jonathan. “60 Reasons Why Entrepreneurship Is Amazing.” Entrepreneur, 9 Mar. 2015, www.entrepreneur.com/article/243389.

16 reasons why you should be an entrepreneur Read More »

Entrepreneurship is no rocket science!

/ Motivation

Many people have this misconception that only people with money can jump into entrepreneurship. Many others believe that everyone who does business must have an MBA degree to guarantee success! However, I firmly believe that anybody from any origin or background can be an entrepreneur! Entrepreneurship is no rocket science!

It does not matter whether you are a male or female. Nobody looks at your qualifications to check whether you are moderately or highly qualified. You can be one if you are not qualified at all! You only need to look up examples on social media to see people of different backgrounds that prove my point.

A person may have meagre or great resources at their disposal. One could be from a business family or not have any family support when they are starting their venture… Whatever the circumstances, I can assure you that success is not determined by the starting point.

You can always succeed as an entrepreneur provided you have the necessary entrepreneurial attitude, mindset, and personality. These are the criteria that can distinguish an entrepreneur from the crowd!

What are these traits and aptitudes that you must have?

First of all, Kuch Kar Gujarne Ki Tamanna Honi Chahiye… You must have that compelling passion/obsession to start your entrepreneurial venture and succeed in it. Follow your passion conscientiously – devote the best time of the day to accomplish what you love to do. This will make sure that your efforts will remain directed towards your end goals. Hone up your craft every day so that you remain competitive in the marketplace.

Second, you must be a tough-minded optimist and possess that never-say-die attitude. The business world is full of risks, and you cannot give up at your first setback. You demonstrate the necessary commitment and determination (what we call “dogged determination”) in whatever you do or decide to do. Always maintain a positive mental attitude. It is your attitude that decides your altitude. Remain optimistic and always see the cup as half-full.

Third, you must be keen to learn things from the circumstances, situations, and people around you. When you are ready to learn from your own experience and mistakes, from the experience and mistakes of others, and from the failures of your ventures, you can grow at a faster pace. As an entrepreneur, you should be a student for life. Think that you are a scientist, and this life is your mega laboratory – experiment and learn again and again – be a crazy learner – learn from all kinds of people, various small vendors, and others. Learn from unconventional areas and situations.

Last but not the least, you must be determined to solve the problems of people and make this world a better place to live. You can solve any problem if you have the right kind of grit and determination. While it is nice to be self-oriented – you must avoid being selfish. You must discover joy in helping people.

REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU ARE DETERMINED, THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE CONSPIRES TO HELP YOU!

If you think you have what it takes, I am here to help too! You can make up for what you don’t have with a dedicated Mentor to guide and support you through your entrepreneurial journey. You can use the experience and knowledge I have gained over the years to your advantage.

So if you have an idea, take the leap! It is no rocket science!

Entrepreneurship is no rocket science! Read More »

A student of life for life

/ Motivation

In my classroom, I always encourage that students develop a growth mindset. Even a student of business studies or entrepreneurship needs to have a perspective similar to a researcher. You must be wondering why?

What I mean is that we all must strive to be learners for life, always being curious and sceptical. Imagine that you are a scientist, and everything around you in life is your mega laboratory. As an inquisitive person, you keep conducting little experiments in your so-called laboratory.

What experiments, you may ask? Your experiments are learning opportunities in life that you pursue. It has a risk of failure. You intentionally put yourself in a position where you don’t know and are curious to learn over and over again. You can learn from people and from your circumstances in life. Even in unconventional situations where you meet someone who does not have the same background as you, be it an auto driver, a customer, a child… they all have the potential to become learning opportunities.

Keep learning, researching, discovering, and exploring…

In my own experiments in life, I have realised that there are three things that ensure our happiness. If you want to have faith in the future, live in the bliss of the present, and have gratitude for the past, these three are foundational principles you must abide by:

LOVE. WORK. HOPE.

1. LOVE

I have always questioned: Can’t we expand our definition of love beyond our near and dear ones, family members and close friends — to embrace all other creations of the Almighty like people from all walks of life including those we don’t know? This enlarged definition of love may also encompass all flora and fauna, and appreciation for various forms of knowledge, creative arts, music and sports etc. The statement I am making here may not be comprehensive to include all possible forms of love on this planet, but I hope you can deduce the significance of what I want to convey. I have learned that success, happiness, and life satisfaction comes to you in an abundant measure when you think about others rather than focusing upon YOU. Connect with others around you in life – add value to their lives, solve their problems, and make sure that they are happy/happier because of your efforts, initiatives, or contributions. While it is nice to be self-oriented – you must avoid being selfish. You must discover joy in helping people.

2. WORK

What you do to make a living takes up a major part of your life. In fact, this defines your professional ambition and ethics. Remember – you have every responsibility to make your professional life enriching and rewarding. You can solve any problem if you have the right kind of grit and determination. Do not be a victim of societal pressures – handle unpleasant circumstances with a calm mind. Do not react. Instead, provide a structured response to the triggers from the external environment. Your resolve will also become the fuel when you follow your passion conscientiously. Devote the best time of the day to do and accomplish what you love to do. This will make sure that your efforts will remain directed towards your end goals

3. HOPE.

Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all the darkness. Always maintain a positive mental attitude. You must have heard this proverb: “It is your attitude that decides your altitude.” I really believe that you must remain optimistic and always see the cup as half-full. When you are faced with the ups and downs of life, remember to even embrace and celebrate failures. I have said this before on this blog: Failures are stepping stones to eventual success. Failures provide us opportunities to learn from our past mistakes as also from the mistake of others. Do not be impressed by money, titles, appearances, social media, and degrees – instead be impressed by values like empathy, kindness, generosity, humility, integrity, and honesty.

With these three principles in mind, you will be able to both succeed and enjoy the journey of life. When you have love in your heart, a compelling professional ambition in your head and hope and positivity around you, you can make the most of everything on the way before you reach your destination!

A student of life for life Read More »

When I faced an ethical dilemma as a student

/ Motivation, Personal

This is a real-life story. I have narrated some personal stories in the blog about the challenges I had faced in the workplace. (You can read these popular posts here: 1, 2). But the one I am going to narrate today is an anecdote from my years as an engineering student.

This story resurfaced in my memory only recently since I hardly think back to my college years. As I was narrating this incident of my life to my students in a classroom session, I realized that this is a good piece for my blog. So, before I start, let me offer my thanks to one of my favourite students Gurman Kaur who wrote the first draft of it based on my telephonic narration to her! I want to take this opportunity to appreciate the good work done by Gurman.

Here’s how the story unfolds…

This is about the time I was a young, engineering student at Harcourt Butler Technological Institute, Kanpur — now transformed into a full-fledged university known as Harcourt Butler Technical University. Not to brag, but I was a good student — sharp, sincere, and dedicated. So, whenever exams were around the corner, it was an especially stressful time for me. I would want to do my best and put in all my energies towards the preparation.

As science students, we would conduct various experiments in the laboratory. There was a separate paper on chemistry practicals. On the day of the exam, we would be asked to conduct one particular experiment from all of the ones we had learned, and present our results. We were given all the chemicals and instruments required and had to conduct this individually (of course, without any assistance from the professor!) To add to the pressure, an external faculty would also be called to judge the results presented by us.

On the day of the practical exam, you could imagine how I was justifiably nervous. In my table at the lab, I could see that the task I was assigned was to conduct a potentiometric titration experiment and plot the graph based on readings I got during my experiment. I thought to myself: I got this!

But maybe it was too soon for me to feel confident. I conducted my experiment, recalling each step correctly and jotting down the results. After completion, I started plotting the readings on the graph paper, I soon realised I was not getting the standard shape of the curve. On the contrary, my readings were guiding me towards an absurd shape of the curve. My titration graph did not look like the ideal curve.

I was taken aback! I was anxious and started thinking about how to troubleshoot the problem. Did I make a serious mistake somewhere? I was sure that I hadn’t. Did I get the readings wrong? There was no way! So, why did my curve not conform to the norm?!

I felt backed into a corner. I thought to myself: What can I do now? I can’t redo the experiment. I am going to fail this subject if I don’t do well in the practicals. Should I mentally prepare myself that this exam is ruined? Should I fake my results? Should I just change the numbers slightly so it fits the expected graph? My mind was racing. I was thinking in circles. I had an ethical dilemma before me. Who cares if a student-researcher forges the numbers of a test? Is it a big deal? I was battling against myself.

In the end, I decided that I will write exactly what had happened instead of choosing to manipulate the results. If I must fail, then so be it. I cannot, in good conscience, change the numbers to fit a certain graph.

Almost resigning to my fate, I wrote down all the wrong readings, as absurd they might be. In the analysis section of the paper, I reasoned why the readings could have been wrong, what conditions could have led to it. I also mentioned in detail the possible mistakes I might have committed during the process of experimentation.

I left the laboratory feeling a bit down. But I knew in my heart, I wouldn’t have felt any better if I had forged the numbers either. So, I just promised myself that I will do better the next time I have to give this exam again.

Time went by and then came the Judgement day- Results!

Like I said, I was resigned to my fate and had almost expected to see an average score or even the red letter “F” in the score-chart. To my pleasant surprise, I saw a score of 92%! I gasped, How could it be?

I went to meet my chemistry professor immediately. I told him how I was not expecting the result at all since my titration graph was not the “correct answer” that I should have gotten after my experiments. So how could I score A-grade marks?!

My professor not only congratulated me on my 92% score but also told me that the external examiner was really impressed and had praised my integrity. To be precise, the examiner’s words were, “A real experimenter is not somebody who worries about what the outcome might be, but rather shifts their focus towards the “Why” of the outcome. It’s not about whether you’re getting the right or wrong results, but about whether you’re able to analyse the result and arrive at the truth of the matter.”

I was really happy after hearing my professor’s words. I was glad that my integrity was appreciated. The essence of a true researcher lies in their intellectual honesty. What an important lesson to learn!

This incident made me realise a few important things: As a student, as long as your fundamentals have firm roots and you work righteously towards learning and growing, there’s not a single wind that can uproot you. Your goal shouldn’t be to manipulate the answers to make them sound “right” but to understand and critically reason about the “Why” and the “How” of the subject. In the end, exams are also a test of character, and you are competing not with other students, but yourself.

Moral:
Sow the seeds of curiosity, be ethical while nurturing it, and you’ll bear the fruits of knowledge!

When I faced an ethical dilemma as a student Read More »

#StoryoftheMonth: State of Mind

/ Motivation

This is a new segment on my blog called #StoryoftheMonth. The idea is to bring forward short stories, fables, and anecdotes, that have a moral or insight for the delight of my readers! So, make sure you look out for these stories once every month!   

The following story was contributed by my colleague, friend, and a reader of the blog: Professor Sudarshan Srinivasan. He often sends me interesting short stories as messages, and this time this particular story caught my eye. It is a thought-provoking one on “Perspective”.  

This is a widely-shared short story called “State of Mind”.

Murugan, the proprietor of a coffee shop had been busy all day.
Since it was a Saturday, his shop was more crowded than usual. The line of customers seemed unending.
He had been on his toes since morning.
By evening, he felt a splitting headache surfacing. As the clock ticked away, his headache worsened.
Unable to bear it, he stepped out of the shop leaving his staff to look after the sales.
He walked across the street to the Pharmacy to buy himself a painkiller to relieve his headache.
He swallowed the pill and felt relieved.
He knew that in a few minutes he would feel better.
As he strolled out of the shop, he casually asked the salesgirl, “Where is Mr Gopalan, the Chemist? He’s not at the cash counter today!”
The girl replied, “Sir, Mr Gopalan had a splitting headache and said he was going across to your coffee shop. He said a cup of hot coffee would relieve him of his headache.”
The man was pushed deep in his thoughts at the irony of the situation. He mumbled, “Oh! I see.”

This is a typical case of looking outside ourselves for something that we have within us.
How strange, but true! The Chemist relieves his headache by drinking coffee and the coffee shop owner finds relief in a pain-relieving pill! There are so many popular versions of this story, where the character is in search of a solution outside him, only to realise that they had everything required to solve the problem already.


Similarly, many of us travel across the lengths and breadths of the universe and also visit several shrines and ashrams to find peace. Eventually, we come to realize that real peace is within our hearts.

MORAL: 

“Peace is a state of mind.”

Did you like the story? Let me know in the comment section.

#StoryoftheMonth: State of Mind Read More »